Death and Turkey

People stop being so co dependent and self pitying. I’m alone for turkey day and I have my oldies cranked, wine, good movie from netflix, and I’m happy with that.  Bad families, Good families.  Good Holidays, and Holidays from Hell.  Alone or with people.  It shouldn’t bother you.  You should be able to be happy with yourself or with people.  With your Dad or with the in laws.  We are all dealt a hand.  Play it right America.  Its up to you to be happy with what you got sometimes. Like our future the holidays seem to mirror how out of our control our lives really are.  Honey we are eating dinner with my parents and thats final.  Little timmy you will be nice to you Grandpa and not put food on his face when he is asleep at the table.  FUCK THE TURKEY IS BURNT!  Life throws curve balls at you America.  But that boring sport, with a built in stretch period, is our thing so tighten up on the bat and hit it out of the park.  Be good to your in laws, get over the burnt turkey at least you didnt burn down the house.  Chinese Anyone?  Life is going to fuck with you just deal with it and dont be so morose  Timmy stop that, or try using a fork to flick it from across the room so you can say how was it me I’m way over here?  It’s all in the wrist timmy similar to a wrist move you will learn in a few years.  Be happy with what you got.  You can loath, drink, kill yourself or play some tunes, get some wine, a classic Poseidon Adventure, and honor your fallen dad by cooking a hell of a meal for yourself just the way he showed you in the kitchen at the farm.  Hey and if all else fails you can always stop wearing condoms and make a new family America;)  Now I must go or I’m going to shout THE TURKEY IS BURNING!.

But what I’m trying to say, the wine is no longer helping, is that Death and the holidays are very similar. Your never where you want to be,  it comes far to soon, and takes way to long.  What you do at the holidays and our deaths is what defines us as Gentleman or Ladies you cute things you I can’t forget the ladies.  Will you smile, play some tunes, drink some wine, and make the best of it.  Or be a little bitch?  Your call America.  And kiss my ass about edits buy my book to get edits i have a turkey to cook.

Peace Love and Turkey grease America, but no grease fires put the turkey in the pot first then add the grease so you dont overflow it.  Remove turkey boil grease, reapply turkey and it wont overflow in the fire burning your house down.  If your house is burning read my story about apartment fires it may help.  Hope you read fast.  THE TURKEY!

Doing it my way

Taylor Oceans

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=egY8rUpxqcE

16 thoughts on “Death and Turkey

  1. This was AWESOME, and thank you!! I thoroughly needed this now that my back is killing me from all the labor I had to do. I promise not to feel sorry for myself and be grateful for the good while also trying to forget the crap that made it less than perfect…after all my efforts.

  2. One thing I have learned in life is that if you like crowds, then your identity belongs to the crowd and it is defined by the crowd. My Granddaughter said, “It’s tiresome.” about being surrounded by people all the time. She’s a smart girl. Self acceptance precedes God acceptance. Thank you for the post. Sincerely.

  3. I was alone for my vegan Thanksgiving Day, actually Thanksgiving Eve. I got out for several hours and ate at my favorite restaurant. A dull melancholy hit seeing all the families and couples laughing and talking, but I went to the shop next store and chatted happily with my manager friend while I browsed. It was the next day that was a bitch. Not all of it, about an hour from start to finish, but its brutality never ceases to astonish me. I was prepared. Had my bag of tricks to make it through the day (I’ve dealt with chronic suicidal ideation most of my life, meaning I think about death or killing myself every day). The “active” days are but a few a month. No pity party. Them’s the facts and I deal with it. DVD, good leftovers, great book, music, the kitties–a huge reason I’m still here–meditating, yoga, dancing…and a lavender melancholy (my term for peaceful, non-active thoughts of death) turned into a demon possession (I’m agnostic but it’s the closest approximation I can find) that I had to exorcise by dancing the full 30 minutes and completing my yoga practice. A peaceful scene on the outside–inside, staring it in the face while screaming out my hatred and anger, walking naked through fields of rosebushes, letting thorns tear my skin to shreds. As I began the last pose, the battle in my head receded till all was still and calm.I don’t know if I won or if it withdrew into its cave. I found this quote most mirrored these active ideations:

    “A phenomenon that a number of people have noted while in deep depression is the sense of being accompanied by a second self — a wraithlike observer who, not sharing the dementia of his double, is able to watch with dispassionate curiosity as his companion struggles against the oncoming disaster, or decides to embrace it. There is a theatrical quality about all this, and during the next several days, as I went about stolidly preparing for extinction, I couldn’t shake off a sense of melodrama — a melodrama in which I, the victim-to-be of self-murder, was both the solitary actor and lone member of the audience.”
    ― William Styron, Darkness Visible: A Memoir of Madness

    Anyhoo, just thought I’d pass this along. I appreciate your honesty. That’s how I try to write, to live. Stories can help.

    • If—
      BY RUDYARD KIPLING
      (‘Brother Square-Toes’—Rewards and Fairies)

      If you can keep your head when all about you
      Are losing theirs and blaming it on you,
      If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
      But make allowance for their doubting too;
      If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
      Or being lied about, don’t deal in lies,
      Or being hated, don’t give way to hating,
      And yet don’t look too good, nor talk too wise:

      If you can dream—and not make dreams your master;
      If you can think—and not make thoughts your aim;
      If you can meet with Triumph and Disaster
      And treat those two impostors just the same;
      If you can bear to hear the truth you’ve spoken
      Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
      Or watch the things you gave your life to, broken,
      And stoop and build ’em up with worn-out tools:

      If you can make one heap of all your winnings
      And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
      And lose, and start again at your beginnings
      And never breathe a word about your loss;
      If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
      To serve your turn long after they are gone,
      And so hold on when there is nothing in you
      Except the Will which says to them: ‘Hold on!’

      If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
      Or walk with Kings—nor lose the common touch,
      If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you,
      If all men count with you, but none too much;
      If you can fill the unforgiving minute
      With sixty seconds’ worth of distance run,
      Yours is the Earth and everything that’s in it,
      And—which is more—you’ll be a Man, my son!

      Thats my quote. As for “chronic suicidal ideation” Come on don’t let shrinks scare you. I’m sure if a shrink looked in my head he would find all sorts of separation anxiety, post traumatic stress, alcoholism, egotistical, sex addict, bi polar and a highly functional sociopath. Not to mention scoliosis (45 degree baby) and dyslexia. I still put my pants on like everyone else. It’s not what the burden is. We all carry one. Its the dignity you carry it with. A quote of my own. And all those shrink separate themselves from society and difficult thoughts by constant interpretation. Rather be a sex addict then have a god complex. Of course I am the lord of the bedroom.

      • What dignity, grace, strength, compassion, empathy, and love I carry grew like kudzu from my stay in the psych ward. I found my voice and use it every day to speak for those who can’t and to tell my stories.

        I loved my therapist and psychiatrist. I wouldn’t be here without them. Of course, I save myself, too. I don’t want pity. I’m a writer and all writers know pathos never works.

        I know I’m beautiful and smart and funny and sexy and a great kisser and love giving blow jobs and I can’t wait to be and do all those things with someone wherever and whenever possible. I’d ruin you in the bedroom.

        I appreciate your philosophy on living. I’ve more than one quote, too. And I think if you knew me you’d find our philosophies similar. Our journeys differ, that’s all. Thanks for the pep talk.

  4. One of my favorite Christmases I spent alone watching Natural Born Killers and eating soy bologna. I would have eaten beef bologna but I couldn’t afford it. 🙂

  5. It seems like you took the thoughts right out of my brain! I always tell people to stop being so co dependent all the time. If you’re happier being alone with the good drink, movie marathon (well, a marathon for me anyway), great music that you love that you can only listen to alone otherwise people would gripe at you (guess this is me again…), and delicious food, just go do it!

    “Life is going to fuck with you just deal with it and dont be so morose…” that is an awesome line that I would just love to put onto a messenger bag and wear it around all day long. Great post!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s